US Government to send $1 billion more aid to fight Liturgy War

WASHINGTON, DC—The United States Congress voted to expand military aid by almost $1 billion as America ramps up involvement in the Liturgy War. 

Most of the aid package is for the development of new, more advanced liturgical weapons designed to counter traditionalist attacks. The largest part of the funds, $550 million, will go to research of new Magisterial documentation. The remaining money will purchase more existing Magisterial weaponry, including TRADCUST-21D missiles and Responsa-11 battle tanks. 

The move is another escalation in what has now become a global conflict, as major Western powers continue to pour weapons and sanctions into local parishes. And while most liberal democracies have backed the progressive parochial armies, other foreign powers are diverting significant resources to trad “freedom fighters” as the guerilla movement maintains a firm but loosening grip over several dioceses. 

“TRADCUSTs and Responsas have been so successful that we can’t keep up with demand,” a US official briefed on the situation told The Daily Inquisition. “Every day there’s requests from the front lines for more Magisterium-class equipment. But the traditionalists will find a way to counter these eventually, so we need to prioritize further weapon development.” 

The Liturgy War has been raging for decades since traditionalist forces first invaded four parishes in 1962. Trad propaganda framed the invasion as “liberation,” claiming the churches were controlled by heretics after most Western dioceses declared independence from tradition at the Second Vatican Council. But traditionalist progress was slower than anticipated, and the previously-institutional invasion quickly devolved into localized guerilla warfare. The conflict has remained at a stalemate since then, with neither side being able to maintain control over acquired territory. 

“Hopefully the arrival of new ordinance will bring an end to this destructive fighting,” the US official said. Conservative estimates say that the war has claimed about 71,000 priests and seminarians so far.